Part I: In the first person. Cataclysm --

When you try to die and don't --

Psych-ward sojourn --

What, me depressed? --

When diagnosis makes you crazy --

Killing yourself is tougher than you'd think --

Know thine enemy --

Checking boxes --

Suicide blues --

Getting in trouble --

Part II: Treatment attempts. A pill-popping parade --

Good noticing! --

Zapping, shocking, and burning your brain into submission --

Brainiacs --

A dry pharma pipeline --

Old illness, new tricks : the electrode in your brain --

Old illness, new tricks : from psychedelics to smartphones --

Part III: A kick in the teeth. Stigma and related bullshit --

Through the cracks --

Mental health is for rich people --

Trying to heal the littlest minds --

"More children do not have to die" --

Race as barrier --

Part IV: In the maze. Who you gonna call? --

How to talk about what we talk about when we talk about wanting to die --

Certifiable --

Trust issues --

Part V: A denouement of sorts. First person afterword.